30 Questions To Ask Yourself

The year of 2015 is coming to its end, and I'd like to sum it up a bit. I still have some plans I feel like I must execute, but they won't change the main, you know, volume of emotions. I had such an amazing year, didn't I? It changed me pretty much, helped me to understand what I want from life.
Not so long ago I found a post on our Russian version of Facebook that included some interesting questions people may ask themselves about their lives (originally the questions are from the book "My 5 years. 365 questions, 1825 answers. Diary"). They say to answer privately and show nobody, but I think it's a funny way to share my thoughts about the year with you. Maybe there're gonna be the questions I won't want to answer, so I'll politely skip them. Let's start!

1. The best moment of the year is...
My American trip, beyond doubt. I know, I worked in the children camp for the first time, I finished my 1st year at university this year and started the 2nd, but nevertheless my travel to LA was the most amazing and unforgettable for many reasons.

2. What inspired me the most this year?
Oh, difficulties have started. I can't help mentioning my mind-blowing travel again. People around me inspire me all the time. Participating in the contests with my student organization. Reading good literature, for sure; literature never lets me down.

3. The main news of the year.
I started working seriously. I became the English tutor in February and a teacher in the camp in June. Also now I can speak French!

4. The anthem of the year.
Man, you know, questions about music are HARD! Probably I could have pointed out one song the previous years, but not this one. I can't recall one song. Let it be Sweater Weather by The Neighbourhood, the Eurovision 2015 winning song Heroes by Måns Zelmerlöw, Style by Taylor Swift and Colors by Halsey.

5. The most important people in my life. (this year, apparently)
Well, I can't but mention my parents and best friends who are my most important people in my life forever. Also I'd like to point out the Australian man I met in LA. Nowadays, when several months have passed by, I understand that I won't exaggerate when saying that he kinda influenced my perception of the world and myself mainly. It's one in a million chance to get to know such a person, believe me.

6. What was the most difficult for me?
Umm, making up your mind is always difficult. Sometimes working with the children at camp was difficult; I even cried twice during the term. Urging myself to read all the necessary literature even if I totally don't feel like is always a challenge too.

7. What color was this year?
Oy, I could send you to Colors by Halsey here, too:) But having to choose the color of the year, I'd say red. Red is my second favorite color, and my 2015 has been so vibrant and energetic and full of unexpected things, so it was red. ("... but loving him was red")

8. What event of this year I'd like to remember forever?
Is it going to be another post about my LA trip or what?

9. What word I used most often?
Hmm, interesting. I'd probably be able to answer this question in Russian. In English I'd choose the word expression "on point", let it be so.

10. The most ridiculous purchase of the year.
I hope I learnt not to waste money this year as being a student. So I think I never bought anything ridiculous in 2015. Or I try not to remember.

11. I'd better experiment with...
Oh my, I think I've experimented enough this year. Perhaps, there's even nothing I'd regret. YOU GO, GIRL!

12. This year was great because...
I realized many plans and ideas, I tried and did what I hadn't done before. I met so many amazing people; many of them have become my good friends. I traveled all on my own abroad for the first time.

13. What intimate problem have I solved?
I don't know. Usually I try to avoid noticing problems including my owns. I still try to understand my nature, so I'll leave this question open.

14. Whom I hugged at night?
That's almost offensive. I hug my plush cat toy at night, you know. Well, I wasn't that hopeless this year, but they are more one night stand cases :c

15. At whose wedding I partied?
At no one's.

16. What average salary did I have this year?
*politely skipping*

17. Did I have a conversation that changed everything in my mind?
I don't think I'm capable of recalling one particular conversation. I try to extract something useful from every conversation I have. Talking to foreigners was remarkable; and conversations with my camp co-workers were always great.

18. What new business have I started this year?
Well, I've already written about my work. Though I don't earn much money, but I enjoy teaching my little students English, it's my own little serious business.

19. If I could become a super hero for one day, what would I do?
It might sound selfish, but if I were a super hero for a day, I'd fly to my guys in LA. Seriously.

20. What do I dream about?
Is it about 2015 or what? I have many dreams actually. Right now I dream to successfully pass my exams beforehand this semester and come to my hometown for a whole month.

21. What I consider to be my biggest achievement?
My successful American trip. Sorry.

22. Express this year (up to this day) in one phrase.
Off the hook.

23. The last message that I sent.
You won't be much excited about that: the last thing I sent was the translated sentences I sent to my group mates. Sorry.

24. A quotation that suits this year.
"I don't believe you. I believe in you" © the Canadian guy I met in LA

25. Have I realized everything I planned for this year?
Not yet. Only some chore stuff are left. But globally yes, I've done everything I planned. Well done.

26. How many new friends have I made this year?
I'm bad at counting. I guess there are about 4-5 new good friends I made this year.

27. Whom I helped this year?
Myself firstly. My Australian man. Cherry Lady. Tatyana. I like helping people if I'm sure I can.

28. What places have I visited?
OOOOHHH should I count my hometown? Besides, there are West Hollywood, Venice Beach, Downtown LA and all the other places I went to in LA. Most of them were new for me. Oh, and Tokyo! I've been to Tokyo for the first time!

29. What business have I put off till the next year?
Recording the songs that I wrote because I don't have any instruments here in Vladivostok (yet). So I wait for coming to Yuzhno-Sakhalinsk and creating some (I think) cool stuff there.

30. What do I want to achieve in the new year?
Discovering new aspects of my soul. I want to live happily in general. Earlier I'd absolutely send a wish upon a star for a boyfriend. Now I get it that I don't constantly need a boy to feel happy. Of course, I don't deny the need of somebody by my side. But unless I'm fully satisfied with myself, I won't be satisfied with anyone. Plus now I know I don't need a boy - I need a man ("who can do it like I can"). I guess I met someone who looked like my ideal this year, and now it's pretty tough to find somebody like him. But actually I don't look for anyone on purpose. I believe if I feel confident, my destiny will find me easily. So feeling constantly confident, being patient and attentive is what I want to achieve in the new year.

That's it! Maybe, my answers were pretty obvious and silly, but they are mine, don't you think? Try to answer yourself and see how amazing your 2015 was!

Be brave

Summertime Sadness IV

Whether you're a school boy/girl with your holiday or a student like me with the exams ahead, no one can deny the excitement about summer! Yey! What do you expect of your summer? I expect a wild time!
Right time I really worry about my exams, because I know I'll get excellent marks for the most of them automatically, but some still upset me. For example, the history of foreign literature. I know that I totally fucked up the last test, and I don't know what our teacher will tell me. I've attended all her classes and worked pretty good, so I may just rewrite the test (if everything goes well) OR go straight to hell to the exam. If I have to take the exam, I'll have to memorize aaaaaall we've learnt since the very beginning of the semester. And I don't want it. So now I'll wait till Thursday to acknowledge my destiny.
The next thing I have to get over with is the medical examination my student organisation and I will go through to work in the summer camp. Everybody knows that going around the doctors isn't the most pleasant thing on the world. But anyhow I would have to face that medical examination sooner or later. Unfortunately it's happening in such a complicated city like Vladivostok.
But these two things are pretty blue. There are definitely more bright things to anticipate! First of all it's my first term in the summer camp as a teacher.
~~Time for an interesting story~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Back in 2011 I visited the Russian All Children Camp "Ocean" in Vladivostok for the first time. It was so awesome! "Ocean" is one of thee legend camps in Russia, and I chanced to visit it for free! The atmosphere was one of a kind, there's still nothing comparing to it. And then I promised myself that one day I would return to Vladivostok, I would work there, I wanted to work in "Ocean" as the teacher. That day I thought that maybe I would study in Vladivostok, even though in 2011 I longed for St. Petersburg. And BA DUM TSSS! Here I am studying in Vladivostok and about to work as a teacher in a summer camp. Isn't it a miracle? They say, dreams come true. So hey, life! Where's my Saint-Petersburg???
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What do I expect of my work in the summer camp? I don't know. I have an image in my head, but it would take too long to describe. On the other hand I'm a little bit afraid, of course. I always tend to anticipate too much and then I'm disappointed that I get too little. So I'd better think positively and not build on sand.
After the summer camp I'll think hard about what to do during my nearly 2 weeks in Vladivostok before leaving for a better place. I'll live with my aunt and uncle, but I won't connect much with them, because they'll have their own children visiting them. So I'll keep on exploring the city of Vladivostok and spending money.
 Then I'll have a marvellous trip. But I won't inform you much about it now (if I haven't already done it before). And the last 2 weeks of summer I'll spend in Yuzhno-Sakhalinsk, my hometown. It's kinda crazy - only two weeks! Fourteen days and nights! Only those days I'll meet my parents, Dasha, Ilya and other guys from my Sakhalin gang. I hope it'll be insane enough not to get bored even once in that fortnight.
Well, it's my rough plan for the summer 2015. And the song of the day will be "Summertime Sadness" by adorable Lana Del Rey traditionally. Because we all got it.

Be brave

P.S. I've noticed that I forgot to write the "Summertime Sadness IV" post in the end of the previous summer. Such a pity! But I won't miscount, so exactly this pot will be the fourth of "SS" series as it is. 

Grande Amore To Heroes With A Million Voices

How do you like my title, huh? Do you recognize anything? I'm sure you do as well as you know that I'm a super Eurovision fan. And of course you shouldn't doubt that Dasha and I woke up so early last week just to watch our favourite show live. I must admit that I really LOVED this year's Eurovision! I don't recall a better show since 2009. I liked so many songs. But there's always a 'but', and I feel like mentioning that the show itself could have been greater. I mean the opening ceremony, fireworks, dances, surprises... It was the 60th Eurovision anniversary! And I'm not the only one who thinks so. I've chanced to talk to a Swedish guy, and he noticed the luck of celebration too. I understand that nothing compares to the show Russia launched back in 2009, but they could try. Nevertheless, I really enjoyed the time spent with Eurovision. Of course, Dasha and I made such a mess in our social networks, but it was worth it.

Now a couple of words about my favourites. One of the first guys I liked was a duet from Estonia with the song called "Goodbye to Yesterday". I immediately noticed that their song strongly reminded me of another song, and in the end of that day I realized I had been thinking about "I Love You" by Woodkid, and Dasha agreed. Compare too!

I can't help writing about the Belgium singer Loïc Nottet who smashed the Internet with his hit "Rhythm Inside". It was the second track that reminded me of something else. "Rhythm Inside" reminded me of Lorde's works, it was obvious with the first claps. 

I also loved a wonderful duet from Norway with "A Monster Like Me". The red-haired songstress reminded of Florence and the Machine, but it was the only resemblance with anything that I had noticed. I won't annoy you with that anymore :) So I absolutely fell for the song, it's 'so me' as the basic girls may say. 

I also liked the girl from Ireland, though she didn't make it to the Grand Final. I like thr type of song she performed, so let it live here.

Do you see that almost all of the songs I've mentioned are ballads? So the next singer didn't have to work hard to be noticed, because he had such a club song. And I'm talking about Nadav Guedj with his track "Golden Boy". People compared him with Justin Timberlake, I saw and heard a lot of Jason Derulo. And he's only 16!! 

I can't leave the winner without my attention, of course. His performance touched every heart and mind, I think. The staging of the performance is incredible, the guy is adorable, the song is powerful. What else do you need from a winner? I'm obviously satisfied with Måns Zelmerlöw, he's definitely the hero of his country to bring Eurovision back to Sweden so soon! I must remind you that Sweden held the contest not so long ago, just in 2013. Sweden always sends decent singers with cool songs to Eurovision Song Contest. And Dasha and I hope to see Eric Saade the next year, maybe just like a host. Please?

Ok, here you go, Russia! Actually I hadn't paid much attention to the Russian entry before Polina's performance. Our song "A Million Voices" is a strong ballad that Eurovision has every year, so I didn't hope much, especially in the political situation we have. But when Polina got on stage, I remembered her live performance I'd seen before in Yuzhno-Sakhalinsk and understood she would blow anyone's mind away. And she did! When they were telling the results from each country and Polina held the 1st place for a long time, I hardly kept my emotions! I thought like "OMG! It can't be truth!" And so well, it wasn't... :D BUT THE SECOND PLACE! It's our best result since the victory in 2008! I was surprisingly proud of Russia, Polina's emotions were inimitable. Go, Russia!

Aaaaaand these guys must be my most favourite. The following lines will be full of love and admiration. So, the object of my love is... a marvellous, wonderful, perfect trio "Il Volo" from Italy with their amazing song "Grande Amore". OH MIO DIO, LORO FIABESCHI, AMO LORO! CHE BELLE VOCI! BELLISSIMO! Grazie, grazie, ragazzi! I hadn't listened to their song before the contest, so I only heard some samples during the semi-finals and thought "Oh, it must be great!" I didn't wait much from Italy, because previous songs hadn't been very impressive. But when those three young men came on stage, opened their mouths and led people to heaven, I understood that I found a new musical power for my life. And another reason to learn Italian!! Then I figured out that the guys are only about 2 years older than me, and I was like "Oh my! Where can I get a visa to Italy?" Just listen to them! They sing not for you, but right into your soul, invading in your private space and remaining there like the owners. Of course, I soon found their other songs, and now I wanna take a bath in their voices. Finally I found a resource with which I'll learn Italian ASAP. Grazie.

I liked more songs than I've described, but these are really worth writing about. I hope you have easily determined the song of the day. 

Talking about the things beside Eurovision, so I've passed all the exams connected with my student organization. I'm almost a teacher of a summer camp!! I'LL WORK WITH MANY CHILDREN THIS SUMMER! Olga, what have you become? I simply hope, the better version of me.

Be brave

An End To Start

Well, hello there, y'all! I haven't written for 'a while', might even have already forgotten how to type. You know, I've had so many things I would fill a book in with all that sht, but at the same time 'all that sht' made me feel exhausted like I'd been working in the deepest mines of hell and Satan never paid me. But I won't overwhelm you with the details and will try to trigger only the most interesting things in my mind about how I finished on of the most important parts of my life and am ready to start a new one. So, here I go.

Drunk On Literature. Dog Show.

So, the first exam's results arrived! And I... got 73 points of 100! That's an awesome result for me, because I'd had no idea what score I approximately would get. And 73 is a real achievement for me. Actually, I don't worry about the results, I'm interested in knowing them. Oh, but I worry about the math, yeah, here I do.
And past Saturday my friend Lera from the chorus (we lived together during the Japanese work) invited me to celebrate my first result in the country. She took me out to the place called called the Warm Lakes, and we were accompanied by her friends. I'm so thankful for her invitation, because I finally got myself away from my laptop and out of our city to meet the nature, though I'm not a huge fan of the countryside. Boys grilled some meat, Lera and I drank some champagne, so everything was alright! Then guys decided to go swimming in the actually-not-so-Warm Lakes. Well, maybe I would join them too, but my nature don't allow me swimming once a month. All in all the trip was nice, thanks to Lera for making that day. Yeah, on the photo below you can see that Lera and I stained each other with the cinder:D

The next day, 8th of June, Dasha got me to a local dog show. She asked me to join her, because her aunt showed her dog there as well, her dag was a Boerboel, the only one on the show. Weeeeeeell, I wouldn't say I was too excited about the dog show. We had to wait for a long time, it was so amazingly stinky around, and you was able to see clouds of dog fur flying in the air! But anyhow it was nice watching the best dogs of our island. And a cute chow chow became the best dog of the show.

Those dogs seemed to be having a date over there

I adore the Pomeranians

This monster was called Hamster. HAMSTER!!

This awesome Samoyed jumped
on me this way too ^O^ 

See the size, they were so huge!

The winner of them all

So, that's how I spent my weekend. Was yours nice? Approximately on June, 11th we'll receive the results for our Russian test, so I can't help longing for them. So it turns out to be the only thing for me to do now - just wait.
The song of the day today will be a funny disco song "Rise Up" by the Greek Eurovision 2014 participants Freaky Fortune feat. Riskykidd. Come on and rise up!

Be brave!

EXAMINATIONS ARE OVER!

It's been a while for the news to gain, so I have much to write about!
Firstly, on Monday I had my English exam. And it was such an adventure! Yes! There was nothing to do with the exam itself, but it's all about how I got to the place. Here's how it should've been. We all had to meet at our own school at 8:30 a.m. and then together head to another school where the exam was to be held. At about 9:45 a.m. we would enter the 'venue' and do everything we had to there. But there wasn't any 'we'. There was me who opened her eyes in the morning and saw the time: 9:53. SEVEN MINUTES TO THE START OF FILLING THE BLANKS IN. HELL NO. I'm not the person to be late, but when I oversleep, the nature always saves my ass mentally waking me up in perfect time for me to put the first things I pick on and get to the place I need right on time. And so this time those 7 minutes were enough to get dressed up and fly to the place of writing the examination. Well, I wasn't perfectly on time, but at the same time I wasn't late - the exam itself officially starts after filling in the blanks, and I though on my coming other pupils wouldn't be writing down their information in the blanks. But when I got to the venue, they hadn't even started yet! So I was a superhero of the day! Well, my description might seem complicated, so just get though what a lucky person I am. The exam for English was fine, not so tough, but still there were a few tasks to think. I wrote everything, while some of my friends didn't have time to write the last task - an essay.
On Tuesday, as I mentioned, I was given a mayor prize. There were only 25 senior students, the best ones of the whole city. Well, the best 24 and me AHAHA. Anyhow I got my money ("Money on my mind, money-money on my mind"), though I hoped the sum would be bigger. But thanks for that too! I've already started spending it for... food. And flowers, I've bought a bouquet for mom! And here's some photos from the event:

All the winners and our acting mayor in the center.
Almost there

So, our [wait a bit and he'll be a true] mayor and me
with antenna hair 

From left to right: my class master, me as diva appearance,
the acting mayor and my classmate (with whom I dance
every school stuff). Somehow I'm in love with this photo

In the beginning of Wednesday I worked hard trying to stuff all necessary math information into my clear head, but in the end of it I partied hard with my chorus headers, friends and one special friend who chanced to drop in on Sakhalin, but only for one (!) evening. And that friend is Nakai-san, who was the curator of our band during the Japanese trip in July-August, 2014. I had been called to the party before, but I though I'd better prepare for the up-coming math exam, the last and hardest, so I refused. But then I decided not to overwhelm my mind and instead of it get some rest with good people. So we spent some time, the vibe was awesome, and I was happy to see Nakai-san for the first time since last September. I strongly hope to see him and other Japanese friends ever again.

So, thanks to Nakai-san himself for this photos of us
all together :)

And today... Todaaaay... TOODAAAY!!! Today I've written my last and most nervous examination - for freaking mathematics! MATH IS HELL, BUT NOW IT'S OVER! I'm ready to write all the paragraph with the Caps Lock button on. I didn't oversleep in the morning, everything was fine about the preparation. The exam itself was... err... I don't feel like describing that sht, the only thing I want to say is that I'm deeply hoping to gain 60 points (of 100, of course) to prove I'm an excellent student. And now, when ALL MY FINAL STATE EXAMS ARE OVER, all I have to do is to wait for the results. Ah, and watch series all nights long, certainly. The first results - for the literature - are about to come soon enough (perfectly tomorrow), so I'm awaiting my first shock.

My mom will come back from Moscow tomorrow morning. I can't help waiting for her! And it's not because I wait for the presents, but because I've been really missing her. You see, she left me right during final exams, when I needed her support like never before. Well, she texted me cheerful words before each exam, called me after them, but it would have been definitely much finer, if I could see her by my side, if she wished me amazing luck in the morning and I told her about everything in the evening without thinking of a call's cost. But I handled it, and so tomorrow she'll come and we'll live happily ever after. Well, until I move out of here. Sure sure, in the university I'll have more difficult things than final school exams, but now (at least, according to the law) I'm still a child needing mother's help.

Aaaaaaaand the song of the day will be a nice and calm song "Long Drive" by Jason Mraz. Everything's as just I like. Though it reminds of "The A Team" by Ed Sheeran a bit, doesn't it? But it doesn't spoil "Long Drive" at all.

Long drive, long night

The best night of my life, 

With you riding, your hand on my hand. 

The thought of arriving, kind of feels like, dying.

I don’t want, to go home and be, alone.

Could we, stay out?

Could you, drive a little slower, don’t matter where we’re going,

As long as I’m with you, we could take the long way.

Chevy Nova, front seat, sofa, getting closer, to you.

Drive a little slower; don’t matter where we’re going, 

As long as I’m with you, we could take the long way.

Drive a little slower, not ready to go home,

I’d rather stay with you.

We could take the long way, to the country out of town.

Let’s get lost; I don’t wanna be found.

Let’s get away, now and be careful not to crash.

There’s no defrost and we’re steaming the glass.

You and the road have a generous shoulder

We can pull over and say we took the long way.

Headlights, not strobe lights,

I can see you, but not quite. 

I can feel you inside; the timing is just right.

For the moment, I don’t want to go home.

Take the long way.

Drive a little slower; don’t matter where we’re going.

Take the long way.

Drive a little slower; don’t matter where we going now.

Take the long way

Drive a little slower; not ready to go home.

I’d rather stay with you.

We can take the long way.

Long drive, long night, 

The best night of my life.

Be brave to pass all the exams

Summertime Sadness III

Not so much has happened since yesterday, but I couldn't miss putting "Summertime Sadness" as the song of the day, because I promised myself so.
I can't believe it's the first day of summer 2014; I remember the first summer day last year, like it was yesterday. Well, I've just gone through my post about that day and about the last summer day of 2013 to make sure how to organize my post's title. And BTW, I'm in love with "Summertime Sadness II" 's ending. How smart of me!
So, what's your plans for this summer? What about me, so firstly I figure on finishing this month called examber (thanks to my imagination), then I plan on sending my docs to the universities I've chosen and waiting to their reaction while partying hard with my friends. After getting permission to enter a university I'll be quickly off to there to give them my original documents and papers they'll need. After two weeks on the land of my university I'll be back to my island for the fortnight as well to do some farewell parties and get finally ready for my new life. And on the last day of summer 2014 you'll already have a post from my new home.
Oh man, how sentimental! But there's no time to cry - tomorrow I'll pass my next to last examination - for English this time. Actually, I can't but wait for the day after tomorrow - I'll get my mayor prize. I seem to not have written of it. OOPS. In spring my teacher asked me to bring all my diplomas to send my summary to the city's administration. It won't be the first mayor prize for me: I got the first one for "Folk Single Singer" nomination and the second one was for "Graduating Student" when I graduated from my music school with the honours degree. Before all this stuff I got a prize from the city council for being an excellent pupil. You see, our Government has sunk not enough money into me;D. I wonder how much it will be this time. MOOOAAAR MOOONEEEEEY!!!
Well, I'm not going to interrupt you anymore today. Just listen to the song of the day and enjoy the start of the summer.

Kiss me hard before you go

Summertime sadness

I just wanted you to know

That, baby, you're the best

I got my red dress on tonight

Dancing in the dark in the pale moonlight

Done my hair up real big beauty queen style

High heels off, I'm feeling alive

Oh, my God, I feel it in the air

Telephone wires above are sizzling like a snare

Honey, I'm on fire, I feel it everywhere

Nothing scares me anymore

(1, 2, 3, 4)

Kiss me hard before you go

Summertime sadness

I just wanted you to know

That, baby, you're the best

I got that summertime, summertime sadness

S-s-summertime, summertime sadness

Got that summertime, summertime sadness

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

I'm feelin' electric tonight

Cruising down the coast goin' 'bout 99

Got my bad baby by my heavenly side

I know if I go, I'll die happy tonight

Oh, my God, I feel it in the air

Telephone wires above are sizzling like a snare

Honey, I'm on fire, I feel it everywhere

Nothing scares me anymore

(1, 2, 3, 4)

Kiss me hard before you go

Summertime sadness

I just wanted you to know

That, baby, you're the best

I got that summertime, summertime sadness

S-s-summertime, summertime sadness

Got that summertime, summertime sadness

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Think I'll miss you forever

Like the stars miss the sun in the morning sky

Later's better than never

Even if you're gone I'm gonna drive (drive, drive)

I got that summertime, summertime sadness

S-s-summertime, summertime sadness

Got that summertime, summertime sadness

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Kiss me hard before you go

Summertime sadness

I just wanted you to know

That, baby, you're the best

I got that summertime, summertime sadness

S-s-summertime, summertime sadness

Got that summertime, summertime sadness

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Be brave before you go

P.S. Check out my summer design! *lots of love!*