Overheard

My last semester as a Bachelor's student has started but I'm already procrastinating. In April I'll go to Moscow to participate in a scientific conference. I don't know yet whether I will present my literature report or I'll be just a listener. Anyway, in case I'm game, I should have my report done. But I have no inspiration to do that!! I feel so ashamed because I respect my professor too much to let her down, but I can do nothing with myself! I hope this procrastinating phase will go soon enough. Because I have to write my final work for my diploma too!!!!
Still, I got hella inspired when I overheard about writing a blog. I remembered it had been a pretty long time since the last post.
This time my magical book suggested me writing down a dialogue I've overheard and continue it or join the dialogue as the third party. I will neither continue it nor join it because it's a short dialogue of my roommate and her boyfriend.

"Do you want an apple?" asks the roommate.
"No", her boyfriend answers.
And my roommate goes, "Why?"
Her boyfriend answered with silence.

To be honest, I found this dialogue the most stupid. Right now as I'm typing it, it might even seem a bit of romantic and dreamy. But hell no! It was such a stupid thing to ask that guy why he didn't want an apple! Just because a person doesn't want to eat anything at a certain point of time, duh.
On the other hand, I understand how stupid it looks right now that I'm writing it all down. I may assure you the folks didn't have any hidden meaning in that dialogue. But it gave me another proof of how many unnecessary questions we all ask. Why don't you want this apple? Why don't you wanna watch this movie? Why didn't you call me yesterday? The only person I should ask these why-questions is myself. Why don't I suggest eating this apple together? Why don't I concentrate on my work? Why didn't I call him yesterday? Start with yourself.

I don't remember if I wrote you that I can hardly bear my roommate and I find her boyfriend the most annoying person on Earth. But we all get irritated and stressed so easily nowadays. And instead of blaming a roommate and someone's boyfriend we (I) should start with ourselves (myself).
Meditate more. Do more yoga. Listen to relaxing music and read for pleasure. You do have time for all of these. I mean, we all know it. But do we do it regularly? [Start with myself!] Do I do it regularly?

So I guess the only dialogue we should overhear is the one with ourselves. And not only overhear, we should actively participate in it.

In other aspects of life, I do pretty well. When the warm weather comes I want to start running. I DO! I can't wait to start running. "I ain't running from myself no more" tho.
Not so long ago I got a boost in learning French. Well, a boost in wanting to learn French. And you know what gave me the boost? Our French classes at the university? No. Our reading Carmen in the adapted French? No. A YouTube video? OUI!
The mother of my student (whom I teach English via Skype) once asked me to explain her son Passé Composé. I know this stuff but not on the level of explaining and teaching it. But *in Shangela's voice* I am a professional! So I looked up some theory, some ideas and a couple of videos on how to better present that French beast. And God of YouTube blessed me with this particular diamond:

Damon and Jo are AMAZING and HILARIOUS! I must admit, this little video by them about Passé Composé must have changed my attitude to Passé Composé and made me want to master anything I know in French and learn more. And y'all should know I ~know~ a lot. But I know it only theoretically. So I wish I put it anyhow in practice. Luckily I have a couple of French-speaking friends on Facebook, so shout out to them!

I think I've hit my time-limit (I feel like I got used to finishing my posts at around 2 a.m. wtfn).
So I see you next time! Bisous, à bientôt !

Be brave to push your limits

TV

Television is a part of media, a kind of art on its own. Some people thought TV would die out with the spreading of the Internet. But we all know it has not. It goes the same way as people thought newspapers and theatre and books would die out with the invention of TV. Well, of course nowadays the Holy Grail of Internet has a HUGE influence on everything and everyone. And television seems to integrate with the Internet somehow. You know, all these smart TVs with the Internet and all the jazz I don't have. But what I do have is my smart-ass laptop with the Internet that gives me access to all the kinds of TV shows I wanna watch.

And the shows we watch influence our lives heavily. Especially with this binge-watching trend. If you only knew that right now as I'm typing this text a drag queen in my head voices over the words with the intonations of all my favorite drag queens that I saw on RuPaul's Drag Race because Cherry Lady and I binge-watched it all last academic year long. And now from time to time (read: often) I watch recommended videos with them on YouTube. And last academic year Cherry Lady and I used to wear heavy makeup almost every day. It was no big deal to put on a cut crease eye makeup and go to classes. Actually, it's still no big deal for me but it feels quite unnecessary or what? Sometimes I look through my last year's photos and I'm like, "Wow, gurl! You did that?? Oh my!" (in a positive way). Even though I still can pull off heavy, bright, glittery makeup ('cause ain't no other lady put it down like me) but I just don't. I discussed it with Cherry Lady, and we came to the conclusion that we don't put on heavy makeup this often now because we stopped watching the show this regularly, we don't see the image so often, we don't get influenced so hard. But now I binge-watch America's Next Top Model. So I've noticed that I've started to look after the way I walk and pose on the photographs, I listen carefully to the advice Tyra Banks gives to the contestants and try to apply them in my mere life. And I am only one of a million examples. Some may go to the extremes.

And for sure TV guys know this. TV has been regulating watchers for a pretty long time. As my one and only Beyoncé sings in her "Pretty Hurts", "Blonder hair, flat chest, TV says bigger is better". Many TV shows, beauty pageant broadcasted on TV, series have been dictating people all around the world how we should look, how we should act, how we should live. Thankfully, some of the shows are changing for the better. As in ANTM that I mentioned just in the previous paragraph, Miss Tyra breaks height, weight, gender, race, age stereotypes - and more to come! She's out there to show that we're all beautiful - it's all about how we show ourselves, how we make a statement. Talking about RuPaul's Drag Race, well it's always been about broadening people's worldview, being beautiful inside and outside, and being in peace with yourself.

Well, I've talked only about two TV shows. Unfortunately, there are other programs that are not so good and helpful. I don't know about the rest of the world but here in Russia they can broadcast shows with unproved information and make it seem true like all the languages are derived from Russian. And it's just a small example. Fortunately, tho, that these types of programs are shown on the less popular channels but still - there are people who watch them! News - I won't even try to understand this kind of TV program. Well, I'm okay with the general and entertaining ones. But when it comes to some serious stuff... Gurl, I am no pro in politics, or economics, or whatever... whatsoever. But I know this shit is biased. And I don't know whom to trust. You know all about tough situations in the world. But do we know the truth? Who's right, who's guilty? I think, no TV, no newspaper, no Internet site will tell you. So what I do is try to avoid this kind of information, my life is stressed enough on its own. Or sometimes I can read an article or two on BBC website. But still, I keep my critical thinking on!

I know that nowadays many series are already made to be uploaded to the Internet. Or this Netflix that I don't have - it's like TV but not TV at the same time! I think this is the future of TV. But how wrong I am - it's not the future, it's our reality. (Probably, I was talking about my own future - one day I will have Netflix, won't I?)

Anyway, thanks for reading! It's been another task from Room to Write Project. Now share your thoughts on TV with me! <3 p="">

Be brave

HALLELOO I'M BACK! Introducing Room To Write Project

Hello, everyone! You know it feels quite strange seeing this site page again. I have forgotten where to type in the title! And you might ask me, "Why are you back, young lady?" Here's my story, hun.
Nowadays I'm free from my studying, from exams, from anything (except for some tutoring werq, of course). So I decided that I don't want to let my body and brains destroy themselves. Hence, I committed myself to a 30-day yoga challenge (yaaaaas!) and I remembered about the book I had bought ~omg~ 5 years ago in the United God-bless-them States of America. It's Room to Write by Bonni Goldberg, I must have written about it here a thousand times.
I tried to follow it some years ago in Russian, but I gave up right after the 1st post. So now I feel like giving it another try, but in the language of William Shakespear and Beyoncé now. I've decided to call it Room to Write Project because for me it's a real project. I'll be writing a task given me in the book, then I will or will not add some stories from the life that I have now. I'll title my posts according to the titles of the tasks. Only today the title is different 'cause, umm, you know, it's the first one in a long time. But I'm giving the task's title below anyway. Nevertheless, give me a chance.
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Memory Is Imagination

I remember writing here every day to develop my English skills in the beginning, then - just for fun. It brought me so much joy and pleasure. Understanding that I could express my thoughts in another language (sometimes even better than in my native language), it made me so happy! It still does. Somehow, I let my blog alone, buried it in the lack of time and under 'more important' stuff. I remember I wanted my blog to be big and important, maybe even profitable. But everything needs patience and hard work I didn't wanna put in.

I remember living without a roommate for 2 months at the beginning of this academic year. When I arrived on campus in September, I lived with a pregnant Colombian girl for about a week. Then she fled somewhere I didn't know to give birth to her baby. That's how I was blessed to live without anyone else in my room for 2 months. However, when I left the dorm for the weekend, I tried to leave the room clean in case my new roommate would arrive so she would do it in a clean room.
However! My new roommate appeared in the middle of the week close to the end of the semester when I didn't wait for anybody and was already sure that no one would be moved in my room till the end of the exams session. So I had to run around the room trying to cram all my belongings into the space given to one person (there is a place for 2 persons in our room, so I had been using almost all of it). The girl is a freshman (or freshwoman, modern world), so I think it's okay she has no experience of living independently. But I think she also has no common sense and logic. When we started living together, she would bring all her friends in the room after I went to sleep. They would be whispering to each other. I was like, "Is it okay for you to whisper all along?" No one dared answer. I insisted, "No, really, tell me, is it okay for you?" My roommate's boyfriend acted as the bravest, "Yes". And I cut him, "BUT IT'S NO FOR ME". And then crept from the room apologizing.
It wasn't the last time her boyfriend had to apologize because for a long time he made himself home in our room. I was patient enough, considering it was just a dormitory life. But I ran out of my patience when that fucking boyfriend took my pan's glass top without my permission and broke it! And neither my roommate nor her boyfriend told me about it until I was looking for the top the next day. Moreover, they announced me that via a text. Even though they had at least 3 chances to tell me that in person. It means that both of them just don't have balls to speak truth face to face. Still, as we've been living together for more than a month, my roommate would rather text me than tell me something or suggest something in person. My friends and I think she's afraid of me. Well, I don't mind if she is, I don't mind if she isn't. The only thing I know for sure is that I can't bear her sweet-sweet boyfriend who, I reckon, just hasn't come out of the closet. #BOOM

I remember before my school practice and moving into the campus this academic year I lived independently in the apartment. It was given to me by Uncle Alik, and I lived there only for a little more than two weeks, so I didn't pay for almost anything, I only bought food and things I needed for living myself. It was a little (not tiny, tho) apartment in a pretty nice district of Vladivostok, both quite close to the urban center and to my bf's place, so it was easy and fast for him to get to me. It was a wonderful time full of fun, sun and relax. Even though for a couple of days there was no water due to some repair work. Nevertheless, now I dream, if I get into the Master's here in Vladivostok, I would love to rent this little apartment, even with payment. It was perfect for me, although its design is quite old-fashioned. Very.



To be honest, these memories are pretty recent. They only happened as far as in September. It's like I'm filling you in with the info that I missed writing here (except for impromptu apologizing for leaving my blog lonely). Perhaps, that's for good because if I try to remember something earlier, high chances I wrote about it. I know the task wanted me to write more or to imagine something as if it were my memory. But it's fucking 1:30 am. I'd rather go to sleep.
But I need you to know that I'm SO GLAD to be back.

As I do it - be brave!